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From the Scrooge book:


“Eb!  For fuck’s sake, what’s wrong with you now?”


Allie rolled off of him and punched the pillow a few times before she flopped down, arms crossed in front of her. which only served to showcase those perfect breasts, propped up on the ledge of her forearms.  “Look if you can’t be bothered, neither can I.  What are you looking at?”

“Your tits.”

“Well stop it.”

“Why?  I paid for them.”

She rolled her eyes.  “Want them back?”

Eb laughed.  “No, they look pretty but they feel like oranges.  They’re too hard.”

“Thanks very much.”

“Not your fault, Allie.  I don’t see why they can’t get them right, considering how much they cost.  Anyway I was thinking of Izzy which always puts me off sex,” he lied.

She shrugged and got up to use the bathroom.  He reflected that there was nothing at all wrong with her ass, which he hadn’t paid for.  Go figure.

The phone rang.  It was Cratchit.  “This had better be important, Bob.”

“I thought you would like to know, sir.  Your former partner, Jacob Marley?  He’s dead.”

“Dead?  Wasn’t he just threatening to sue us?  Bastard can't make up his mind, can he?”  Eb chuckled at his own joke.

“He’s committed suicide, sir," Cratchit said with that annoying solemn half whisper people used when talking about things like suicide or cancer or bankruptcy.

“Shame all our expensive clients don’t take the same route.  It’d save us a lot of time and trouble.  Thanks, Bob.”

Figures that Marley would choose Christmas Eve to off himself; he was always such a drama queen.  Scrooge remembered the day he dissolved the partnership, and Marley babbled something about chains and responsibility like some drug-addled old hippie.  Scrooge’s attorney told him he was better off out of the partnership because Marley was probably insane, though frankly it didn’t matter if Marley was howling at every full moon; Scrooge and Marley Medical Corp. was in bad shape, and Scrooge wanted out before he lost everything.  That Marley hadn’t had the same idea wasn’t Scrooge’s fault.  It was a Scrooge-eat-Marley world, he reflected, and that made him laugh out loud.

“What’s so funny?” Allie shouted.

“I amuse myself,” he shouted back.  He switched on the TV and looked for sports or financial news.  He had every damn cable station ever invented and all he really enjoyed were sports and financial news.

Allie finally came back to bed.

“What do you women do in bathrooms for so long?”

“Jill ourselves off because our guys don’t do it for us.  God, more of this blah-blah?  Give me the remote.”


“I mean it, give it to me.  I’m not watching these doofuses go on and on about money.  That may give you a hard-on, Eb, but it just bores me.”  He surrendered the remote and groaned when she switched to an old black-and-white film.  Something about Christmas, he supposed.  He hated Christmas.  Everyone standing around with their hands out, waiting for a gift or a bonus or some other expensive nonsense just because some baby was born poor back in the day and turned into a damned  Socialist, always feeding the poor and preaching about equality.  Religion was all well and good, but it shouldn’t cost anything.

"Jake Marley's dead."

"What?" Allie turned the TV off.  "What happened?"

Scrooge made a shot-to-the-head gesture.  "Suicide.  Pathetic."

"That's all you have to say about it?"

He shrugged.  "What do you want me to do, cry?  Chew the curtains?"

Allie turned the TV  back on.

“What’s on the agenda for the rest of the day?”

Allie sighed, turned down the volume and pulled a planner off the bedside table.  “Make money, make money, make money... lunch, make money...”

He grabbed it away from her and she went back to her movie.

“Ah, okay... address the troops, phone Saunders in Seattle to find out what the hell is going on up there, oh, and the party tonight.  Everything is set, right?”


“The party.  It’s all arranged?”

“Totally,” she replied absently.

“It’s going to cost me a fortune, isn’t it?”

Allie shot him a look.  “Deal with it, Eb.  You want to cheap out on these people?  Want to give them bad drugs, bad booze?  Want to look like a piker?  Fine.  I don’t know why the hell you have money to begin with, you hate spending it so much.”  She got up and began to dress.

“That’s why... Where you going?”

“To do my job.  I’m sick of hearing about how much things cost.  Just deal, or quit the business and go sit on your gold in some cave like some dragon.  Go be a dragon for God’s sake and quit being such a pain in my ass.”

persimmonfrost: Me at age three or so, enjoying the snow (snow)
Tis the season... almost. I don't really count Christmas season as starting until after Thanksgiving, but I've been pre-planning so that this year, while I don't have a lot of money to spare, I can't help but be thinking about the holiday. I think we all know that once you get to be an adult and start to have to pay for all the trappings, make the dinner and be nice to family members you wish would go away forever, it's not all warm fuzzies.

So, Hollywood comes to the rescue! I went through my collection and wrote down all the movies that give me the cheap Christmas thrill, and wanted to share them in spite of the fact that I know not all my choices would be standard fare for the Average American Family. But none of you are that, are you? Noooooo. So the titles and the why of them:
  • Auntie Mame -- Because we need a little Christmas!
  • Bell Book and Candle -- Takes place around the holiday and is a really off-beat take on it.
  • The Bishop's Wife -- Somehow the presence of Loretta Young always makes it feel like Christmas.
  • A Charlie Brown Christmas -- The only thing that could make this better is if it'd had the original Coke commercials in it.
  • A Christmas Story -- Simply the most brilliant Christmas comedy ever.
  • The Cheaters -- Too few people know this film. They used to show it on a local station on Christmas Eve, but then it fell off the radar. Last year TCM showed it for the first time, and I'm hoping that gets to be a tradition over there.
  • Comfort and Joy -- Offbeat little film about a war over ice cream. Stars the wonderful Bill Patterson.
  • The Dead -- Set on 12th Night, but I'll use any excuse to watch what is one of my favorite films.
  • Desk Set -- November through early January. Much wit, craziness and good cheer. Warm and wonderful.
  • Die Hard -- Don't YOU celebrate Christmas with 'splosions?
  • How the Grinch Stole Christmas -- The original cartoon. Do NOT speak to me about Jim Carrey's version.
  • Fanny and Alexander -- The first hour or so is one long Christmas party, and no matter how dark it all becomes afterwards, that sets the tone.
  • Holiday -- My favorite Hepburn/Grant pairing.
  • Holiday Animated Classics -- This was a special release from a local furniture company. Hardrock, Coco and Joe is the draw here but the disc also contains Suzy Snowflake.
  • The Lion in Winter -- Movies about dysfunctional families coming together at Christmas are always great.
  • Little Women -- Yes, I know there's only one Christmas scene, but c'mon! Little Women for heaven's sake!! Any version, really.
  • The Man Who Came to Dinner -- Frickin' hilarious film starring Monty Wooley as the irascible Sheridan Whiteside.
  • Meet Me in St. Louis -- Again, only one part is about Christmas, but if you can listen to "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" without weeping like a baby, you can strike it off the list because you're probably not human anyway.
  • Miracle on 34th St. -- Again, the original only.
  • She Loves Me -- Any musical that has a number like "12 Days 'til Christmas" is a Christmas musical Period.
  • The Shop Around the Corner -- The play that She Loves me was based on. The Stewart/Sullavan pairing is irresistible, too.
  • The Snowman -- Lovely, wistful animated short.
  • We're No Angels -- No seriously, nothing says Christmas like convicts on Devil's Island, plotting murder. Original only!!
persimmonfrost: (Default)
We decided to get an early start today because the plan was to go down to Indiana to shop.  Jim said he knew some good places, apart from Costco where we could look for Christmas trees because neither of us are willing to spend upwards of $300 for a tree this year.  So we went on down to Munster for breakfast at the Riviera which is your basic Hot Brown Food restaurant, and it didn't disappoint.  V. nice, very lemony hollandaise on the eggs benny and good, crisp cottage fries which they called "hash browns."

From there we hit Old Time Pottery in Clarksville, and I have to tell you the prices there were amazing.  We found our 6' pre-lit trees on sale for $59.95.  They're not spectacular-looking by any stretch but the way I figure it is that we'd end up spending that much for a real tree which we'd toss out at the end of the holiday, so if we truly hate these, we can get better ones next year and donate these to some church or something (Jim's suggestion.)  We also got lights, garlands and wreaths for the doors and porch, and some extension cords.  Unbreakable ornaments for the trees in front, and a a couple of gold wicker trees with glitter and a gold deer for the porch.  Also picked up: Cookie tins because it'll be baking time, soon, ornaments for our new trees, and a SHITLOAD of Christmas fribble because -- speaking for myself anyway -- I'm starting almost from scratch this year having lost most of my Christmas stuff in the flood a few years ago.  Since this is the first Christmas in years that I'm looking forward to, I'm not going to skimp even if it means having to put off some other stuff.

Well, by the time we finished (and we spent hours in that store; there are literally aisles of metal pieces for gardens or interiors) we realized that there was no way we could fit another thing into the car so the trip to Costco was canceled.  Instead we did some driving around, looking at Munster, Hammond, Whiting, etc., and finally ended up at  El Taco Real in Hammond where I had the best damn pozole ever, and a good margarita, too.

We drove back via Lake Shore Drive and even though it was kind of hazy, and overcast this evening, the view of the city was still beautiful.  I do love Chicago, though I confess that some of the properties we looked at this afternoon were amazing and made me think that since money goes further in smaller towns, it might not be a bad thing to move out of the city one day.  Though Dawn and I both tend to want to go north to the Madison area rather than into Indiana.

After we unloaded we went upstairs and watched the Good Eats 10th anniversary show, and then a whole lot of House Hunters, HHI and finally Color Splash, and mercilessly ridiculed every buyer and every home.  By 11:30 I was almost punchy so I thought I'd best come down, do my email and all, and then get to bed.  I'm a whole lot poorer (so is Dawn) but Christmas will be kind of pretty this year, and that's a Good Thing.


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Tracy Rowan

August 2013

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